I recently read a blog about the struggles a family has with people questioning her daughter's diagnosis of Autism. This blog starts out like this :
I’ve seen the looks.
I’ve heard the whispers.
Nobody actually says it to my face,
but I see them wonder.
“Are you sure she has autism?"GO ahead and read the rest of " When People Wonder If My Daughter Really Has Autism" ... It's spot on!
Here's the difference in our life.
I don't see 'looks'.
I don't hear 'whispers'.
People actually DO say it to my face.
"He doesn't have Autism."
The pediatric specialist: "He looked at me. He doesn't have Autism."
The school Speech Therapist: "He answered my question. He doesn't have Autism."
The school Occupational Therapist: "He can sit in a chair. He doesn't have Autism."
The pediatric psychologist: "I am an educated person. He does not have Autism."
Then this one from a pediatric neurologist: "Who even diagnosed him with Autism? Easter Seals Autism Diagnostic Clinic? Are they even doctors anyway?"
sigh. It doesn't really matter to any of those people whether he has Autism or not. Please just do your job and help my boy.
To the specialist - he has seizures. That is your job. Help with that.
To the Speech Therapist - He CANNOT answer questions. He cannot think through answers. Help with that.
To the Occupational Therapist - He can sit, however, he canNOT sit still. He cannot keep his shirt on at school. He needs to run. He needs to jump. Loud noises bother him. Bright lights bother him. Help with that.
To the psychologist - Yes, you are educated. But you do not KNOW my son. You do not understand the anxiety and fear he experienced by looking at your cheek and saying "Hi". That is the ROUTINE that I taught him.
To his school teacher, and his principal, and his music teacher, and his PE teacher, and all the other staff that work with him every day:
I appreciate all you do. It is very weary to deal with my son all day. Thank you. PLEASE....remember my son has struggles ... He is not normal.
Do not look at my son
and think that he is being defiant.
Defiance means he needs punishment.
LOOK at my son
and think of him struggling.
Struggling to keep his shoes on.
Struggling to hear your voice above the din of the ceiling lights
Struggling to hold his pencil, instead of throw all of his crayons.
STRUGGLING ...
Be like his bus driver, Miss Star. Miss Star understands that his 'behaviors' are not typical Miss Star understands that his "sticking his middle finger up" is his lack of social skills, and not defiance. Miss Star HELPS him.
Be like Miss Star.
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| BE LIKE MISS STAR! |
HELP him through his struggles. He WANTS to do his schoolwork. He WANTS to play with other kids. He WANTS to sing songs. He is a good kid inside. Help him.
I really enjoyed this post and I appreciate you sharing your personal story. As a teacher candidate, I enjoyed reading this because I want to be a teacher who helps your son and many others learn to work through their struggles so they can be independent, not ignore them.
ReplyDeleteThanks Morgan! We're on spring break this week - so we're all missing Miss Star this week!
DeleteAs a future educator, I found this post very eye opening. We really do need more people like Miss Star in our world who see that not every action is defiance.
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